Mistake

I made a mistake.

A local friend asked me if I could pull together a minyan so he could say Kaddish for his father.

I told him I’d try.

So I sent out an SMS message from our database to a few dozen people I thought might like to help this nice fellow by joining a minyan.

One of the recipients felt my tone was too technical and not heartfelt enough and responded with some healthy rebuke.

It was painful.

But I’ve learned how to go through these painful rebukes a few times in my life.

Here is a line from the Rebbe’s calendar: “My father wrote in a letter: Cherish criticism, for it will place you on the true heights.“

I’ve heard that they’re called blind spots.

Like when you’re driving.

And a car is right beside you, but you just can’t see it.

The only way to find it is by turning your head.

I was created with character flaws (and maybe someone else reading this email was too).

And the worst part about these flaws,

Is that sometimes I’m completely oblivious to them!

I might write something or say something that could come across too intense,

or blunt,

or short, or callous,

In a way that may inadvertently hurt someone’s feelings.

The only way to deal with these blunders,

Is to thank the rebuker.

Apologize.

Take it to heart.

Become a better person.

Find an actionable resolution.

Become more refined.

And then continue living life with joy.

Thank you to the anonymous person who made me a better person .

Hopefully this will help someone else become a better person too.